Sunday, 3 February 2008

Retrieved Reconstituted Crap No 5

Angelica Vale - "If you DARE introduce me as "that well meaty bint" I will tell them exactly why the hole in this piece of cardboard is all sticky, you pervert"

"Yo - your mudflaps are hanging plumb. How about my man-breasts?"

Things we'd like to see No.98 - Honesty in political decision-making. Rudy says: "Faaaark! What a monstrous lie I just told. I'm so ashamed of myself. I'd be letting the American people down if I put myself forward as a presidential candidate now."

OMG You can't conceive? Here, you poor woman. Have one of Bill's spares.

Beyonce: "Those are NOT stretchmarks, they're skidmarks. Read the fucking label!"

"I'm wearing this enormous cock-ring on my head in the hope of snaring a BFG.

Whaddya mean "bollocks"? No problem - I'll just hang them over my shoulders!"

Andre's Spring Collection cuts out the middleman. Offset your carbon emissions directly with a wearable gardengarment tm.

Air Kazakhstan inflight service introduces new "Healthy Options" menu.

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I was feeling superficially wonderful at the time

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